Dear Sandra
by smilelikey0umeanit
Summary: No longer a one-shot. Sandra/Strickland but with a Sherry peck on the cheek over a plate of custard creams thrown in for good measure.
1. The Letter

**A/N: This was inspired from a line in the episode Dark Chocolate- Strickland leaves Sandra a covering letter on a case file that begins with 'Dear Sandra', which my obsessive fangirl mind thought was sweet (or sweeter than the average boss anyway). Please leave a review if you like, they make my day! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Tricks but I live in hope.**

Everything was almost in place for his upcoming holiday. He hadn't realised it would take so much planning, he would only be gone for a week for Heaven's sake, but in the last few days, amongst all his other duties, he'd attended to the quite considerable pile of memos, files and letters in his in-tray, sorted out all the files that were dotted around his office in not quite organised piles, made sure that all of the departments under his remit had everything they needed to survive without him for five days and informed them all, plus the Assistant Commissioner, of his hotel's contact details if they needed him. The last thing he had to do was to leave UCOS a covering letter for their latest case.

He had been given the case by the AC with strict instructions that it was to be handled with the utmost sensitivity. If the press found out that the Met were raking up the rapes of three young women, they would have a field day. He trusted Sandra and her team not to leak any information to the press, they had no reason to, but he didn't trust that some of his other, less experienced colleagues wouldn't be tempted by the financial gain that came with spilling case details to journalists. He sighed, sitting at his desk for what would be the last time, at least for a while.

Opening up a new document on his computer, he began with a formal 'To DS Pullman'. He rarely wrote letters to her, it was usually just a scrawled handwritten sentence on a post-it note, but this case took more explaining than the usual…what? He snorted ironically. Being in the police force for the best part of thirty years now, he had come to accept murders, rapes, kidnappings as normal. The things that he saw, not so much now, but in the past when he had being a young, optimistic man starting out in CID, no longer bothered him. A small part of him still longed to be out on the beat, actively fighting crime rather than just doing paperwork, but he knew he was getting too old for that.

Completing the letter and reaching over to receive it from the printer, the picture of his children caught his eye. They were sitting on a sunny beach in Portugal, smiling up at him with equally sunny smiles. He remembered that scene well- it had been their last holiday with both parents present, although by that stage they were only together for the sake of the children. He had been the one taking the picture, sat on the beach building sandcastles with the children, whilst she was sat to the side, only focused on building up her sun tan. He shook his head, remembering all the things she had done for the sake of vanity and forever thankful they were no longer married.

The letter addressed to Sandra was still open on his computer screen. His thoughts wandered to her again, as they often did. On previous holidays, he had briefly considered not returning to work and giving it all up for a tranquil life in a little fishing village by the ocean, but that was before he had met Sandra. He was drawn to her, for some reason. Yes, she was beautiful, intelligent, successful, but there was something else about her that fascinated him. She had faced so much pain in her life, much more than he would ever know, but still she kept fighting. Fighting for what was right, fighting for the truth, fighting for her boys. To her, he was merely a disruption to the tight-knit UCOS team, someone who constantly seemed to be blocking her path to the result she wanted, but he possessed utter admiration and respect for her, even if she would never know.

With that thought swirling in his mind, he deleted the formal opening to the letter and replaced it with 'Dear Sandra'. He printed out the new version, placed it with the case file and took it down to the UCOS office, which the team had long since vacated in favour of the pub. Gently setting it on her desk so he didn't disturb the rare silence, he retreated back into the main office, only to see the woman who was at the centre of his thoughts stood quietly by the doors.

"Sorry, I was just leaving your new case on your desk before I go on holiday," he explained, aware that his presence in her office at half past nine on a Friday evening had most likely surprised her.

"Oh, thank you, we'll start it on Monday sir," she smiled slightly before remembering the reason why she was there. "I think I've left my purse in my office, have you seen it? Gerry had to pay for the drinks, he wasn't happy about it."

He stepped back into her little haven and retrieved a black purse with gold metallic studs from the floor by her coat stand. "Is this it?"

"Yes, thank you, it must have fallen out of my bag somehow," she reached out to take it, nestling it safely back inside her matching handbag.

"Right, well, I'd better get going. Early start tomorrow," he smiled at the thought of his upcoming escape from hectic London life.

"Where are you going on holiday?" she asked as they stood together into the lift on their way to the foyer.

"Ferragudo, it's a village on the south coast of Portugal. It isn't a huge tourist area and the locals are really lovely people. We used to go there with the kids before we separated." He smiled sadly. The memories were still bittersweet for him.

"It sounds perfect, I could do with a break from being cooped up in that office with three pensioners," she grinned, trying to lift the mood as they arrived in the reception area. "Anyway, I hope you enjoy yourself, you deserve to relax."

"Thank you, I'm sure I will," he replied, suddenly nervous. He thought about asking her to dinner when he returned, but quickly dismissed the idea. This was a normal conversation between him and his subordinate, conservations that other people have with those under their command. His over-stressed mind was running away with itself.

"Goodnight sir," she said cheerily. "Hopefully we'll have that case cleared up by the time you get back." She turned away and began to walk towards her car, which was parked in the dark, unlit car park. He watched her, her heels clicking on the tarmac rhythmically and her hair seeming to shine in contrast to the dark surroundings, until she got into her convertible and drove away into the night.

"Goodnight, Sandra."


	2. Coffee and Custard Creams

**A/N: This is still based on the case featured in the episode **_**Dark Chocolate**_. ** For Sarah and Louise for their lovely reviews which motivated me to write this. Thank you for the support, it makes my day :)**

**Disclaimer: I'm just borrowing New Tricks, I'll give it back at some point…**

Four busy, stressful and frustrating days later, Sandra Pullman would have admitted defeat. If she wasn't so stubborn of course. Instead she was sat at her desk, arms crossed like a petulant child. Not that she could see her desk anyway. The wooden surface was completely swamped with the files, documents and angry letters that the case had amassed. Someone, who had better hope that she would never get her hands on them, had released the details of the highly sensitive case to the press. Now her face was splashed across all the tabloids, with the headlines _"Pensioner coppers traumatise rape victim"_ and her personal favourite on the grounds of its utter hilarity to the rest of the Met: _"Shouldn't that be UCOCS?" _

Stuck in a media storm, the lines of inquiry were limited- she had to think through their next move carefully for fear of upsetting someone and making the whole situation even worse. She was sure the crux of the case rested with the original victim, but Mr Bull-in-a-China-Shop Gerry had upset the poor woman so much, albeit unintentionally, that she refused to have any part in the investigation. Even if they could crack the case based on their findings so far, the witness wouldn't give evidence in court and the bastard would get off scot-free. Without the full backing of the Assistant Commissioner, who hadn't taken the news well, she couldn't take this case any further.

She hated to say it, but she needed Strickland here to get the idiots from upstairs off her back, if only for a couple of days. She sighed, slumping in her chair with her hands resting on the back of her head. Gerry wasn't to know that the serial rapist's first victim had got pregnant as a result and was forced to have an abortion by her parents: she didn't tell the original investigation and there was no record, so it wasn't his fault. She only wished that everyone else would see it that way, at least if only to stop the strange atmosphere in the office. The boys had spent most of the day in silence, occasionally sighing in dejection when they had hit yet another dead end. They hadn't even had their usual elevenses tea-and-biscuits. Something was seriously wrong.

Her thoughts were disturbed by a gentle knock at her office door. She looked up to see it was Gerry, respecting her privacy even though the door was wide open. He was still wearing the look of a lost puppy: he kept glancing down in shame, never meeting her eyes. She smiled. She didn't blame him.

"What is it?" she asked, using a softer tone than normal. She'd been angry at first, he'd essentially wrecked the case; who wouldn't be? But then he'd explained what had happened, and her anger quickly dissipated. Maybe she was mellowing in her old age.

"I just wanted to apologise again, I suppose. I was wondering whether I should go to the AC personally to try and sort it out." He lingered in the doorway, eyeing the chair in front of her desk, wondering whether he was worthy to sit in her presence. She gestured to the chair and he moved to sit down.

"Gerry, look, I don't know how many times I have to say this, you did nothing wrong. I forgive you." she said in a slow monotone so it would get through his thick skull and hopefully lodge itself in his brain. "And don't bloody go to the AC, it'll just make everything worse."

"I know, Guv, I just feel like I've ruined everything for you. I know how badly Strickland wanted us to get a good result on this case and I know he'll probably give you a right bollocking when he gets back-" she shook her head, signalling that she could take anything Strickland threw at her. Not that he would anyway.

"Actually I called him last night, I wanted to warn him so he didn't come back to an absolute shitstorm. He wasn't very impressed but I think I've managed to get him on our side. He even said he'd call the AC and try to explain that we aren't to blame." She explained.

"Bloody hell, he must have been in a good mood!" Gerry exclaimed, surprised at the DAC's fairness. He met Sandra's eyes for the first time that day and she grinned back at him. They were alright again.

"I know, I bet he's at one of those health retreats doing yoga on the beach," she joked. "Still, we're pretty much stuck between a rock and a hard place until the media dies down a bit."

"Yeah well, I guess all we can do is wait." He shrugged.

She nodded. "Then make me a bloody coffee to keep me awake!" He chuckled and retreated back into the main office, reappearing minutes later with coffee in her favourite mug and a plate of custard creams. He placed them on the table then leant over to kiss her on the cheek. "Cheers Guv," he whispered and returned to his desk, greeted with a sarcastic "Oooh!" from Jack and a confused look from Brian. She blinked a couple of times, shaking her head. That bloody man.

"Well gents," Gerry announced, "when you've got a good woman in your life you need to appreciate her,"

"I'll drink to that," Jack replied heartily, raising his cup of tea.

She couldn't help but grin. She really did love her boys sometimes.

* * *

She was disturbed from her peaceful sleep at 7.37 a.m on the following morning by her phone beeping manically. Shit, she had slept through her alarm. She picked up the source of the noise, her eyes automatically screwing up in protest to the bright light. _Strickland. _

"Hello?" she answered, trying to sound less groggy than she felt.

"Sorry, Sandra, did I wake you?" He had thought it was a reasonable time to call. She mustn't be an early riser.

"No, not at all, I'm just feeling a little…tired, that's all, sir," She never had been good at waking up in the morning.

"Right, well I just wanted to call to let you know that I've spoken with the AC and he's agreed to deflect some of the media attention from the case so you can continue with your investigation, I was thinking perhaps you could go speak to the original victim personally and peace talk her, she'd probably be more likely to listen if it's just you, maybe she'd feel more comfortable if it's woman to woman. Do try your best to make sure she doesn't go to the press, and for heaven's sake don't let Gerry near her again."

"Of course, sir. I'll try my best but she was fairly uncomfortable with having it all brought up again, even before the incident with Gerry," she explained.

"It's only natural I suppose. I know how persuasive you can be though, I'm sure you'll manage to bring her round eventually," he encouraged her.

"I hope so. I'm sorry for messing this case up, sir, I know how important it was that we brought closure to the victims and so far we haven't done that. Our main priority is to get the right result for the women involved." She shook her head as she realised she sounded like Gerry.

"I'm sure it'll work out well in the end Sandra, UCOS has an impeccable record on solving sensitive cases like this."

Bloody hell, this holiday really had improved his mood. Normally he'd have been lecturing her for over an hour on how cases like this should be handled with the utmost care. He should go away more often.

"Thank you, sir. How's your holiday going?" she decided to match his upbeat tone.

"Oh, um, yes, it's lovely thank you," he stuttered, surprised that she'd asked. "The weather is great, I'll miss it when I'm back."

"For once the weather over here is actually warm, it makes a nice change," she replied, not quite sure where her small talk was leading.

"I hope it stays that way," she sensed he wanted to say something else, like she had when they'd last had this type of conversation, after she'd left her purse at the office. "Sandra, I was wondering whether you'd like to go to dinner with me when I get back?" he left the question hanging.

It was too early in the morning for this. She remained silent for a moment, considering her answer. Oh, what the hell, she thought, it wasn't like she had any better offers. Unless Gerry wanted to live in her house and provide a constant supply of coffee and custard creams. Which she highly doubted.

"Yes. Yes, I'd like to." She finally answered, feeling a little guilty for leaving him in suspense for a while.

"Really? I mean, that sounds great, what day is best for you?"

She chuckled. The poor man, she'd been putting him off for years because of Gerry Standing's stereotypes. She didn't really mind that it was 'highly inappropriate' to have a relationship with her boss. He was actually alright. "How about Tuesday?"

"Tuesday is fine for me, shall I pick you up at seven?"

"I'll see you then. Enjoy the rest of your holiday," she smiled to herself.

"Thank you, I will. Bye Sandra." He exited the conversation, wondering if what had just happened was a bizarre dream, or as an effect of sunstroke, perhaps?

"Goodbye sir."


	3. Date Night

**A/N: Not sure if anyone is actually reading this but a huge thank you and a virtual cupcake for you if you are, I hope you enjoy this last chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Tricks. My plan is to become Controller of the BBC and have whole evenings of New Tricks re-runs to keep me occupied though.**

"Do you mind if we get this one? I'll pay half," she suggested, pointing to the most expensive wine on the list of the busy restaurant where Rob had chosen to take her for dinner.

"Sandra, I don't mind at all, and I'm paying for everything," he told her firmly. "I've already guessed you have expensive taste, you must have to look stunning 24/7. Especially tonight."

"Oh, you old charmer, you," she teased, deflecting the compliment as always. She marvelled at how the conversation between them so far had flowed easily. She was glad they had finally spent time together which hadn't involved them talking about the weather. Thinking of the weather, her companion had built up a nice tan whilst he was abroad. It was a change to the usual contrast between his dark hair and pale skin, but she liked it. He looked…healthy. Better. "And it's true about my expensive taste, I swear if I did a blindfolded taste test I'd choose the dearest food or drink every time. I'm the same with clothes before I see the prices,"

"I'm sure you are," he smiled, "What do you fancy for starters?"

She perused the menu before reaching her decision. "I think the seared scallops with a lemon and mustard dressing," she announced.

"Is that because they are the most expensive starter, by any chance?"

"Possibly," she shrugged mysteriously. "Do you want me to have something else? I don't mind."

"No, you can have whatever you like, honestly, it's alright,"

She eyed him suspiciously. "You aren't one of those, are you?" She asked, voicing her thoughts.

"One of what?" he replied, confused and slightly unnerved by the sudden difference in her tone.

"One of those men who constantly give in to their partners, you know, when their wives are like 'Darling, can I have a Ferrari? Darling, let's buy a £300 bottle of wine' and they just do it to keep them happy," she elaborated.

"Not really, I'm just trying to…impress you, I suppose. Aren't all men like that?" he pointed out. The things he'd done to keep his ex-wife sweet were ridiculous, in hindsight, but at the time he just wanted their marriage to be happy again. He had felt like a failure because he couldn't make it work. Expensive gifts were the only way he could make it up to her without actually addressing their problems.

She paused, thinking through her answer. "I guess so, but I need a bit of opposition every now and then, it keeps things entertaining," she smirked, and his nerves evaporated as suddenly as they had appeared.

"Basically you want to meet your match?"

There was a momentary pause before her reply came. "Yes and no. Yes, I want a man that can stand up to me and give as good as he gets, but I don't want a volatile relationship. I've had too many of those in the past and believe me, they haven't turned out well. I just want things to be easy, you know?"

He nodded understandingly, reaching his hand towards hers and rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "I know all too well what too much arguing leads to: divorce."

She smiled that small, inscrutable Mona-Lisa smile of hers. "Too right."

"But I think we both know from our…heated debates at work that we can match each other when it comes to shouting. I don't think we argue that much, do we?"

"Not compared to me and Gerry, no," she admitted with a small chuckle. He waited patiently as he sensed that she had something else she wanted to say. She took a long, deep breath, trying to put away the sensible, rational Detective Superintendent in her and bring out Sandra, who was quite frankly bored of returning to an empty house with only a bottle of wine and a microwave curry for one as company.

"I think we'd argue even less if we were together." She almost whispered, fiddling with the tablecloth with her free hand, staring down at the starch white material for reassurance.

He repeated what he'd just heard a few times in his head just to make sure he'd heard it correctly. Desperately trying to think of a suitable response for a first date, other than the words currently circling frantically around his mind (_'Sandra I love you you're amazing marry me'_), he reached across the table and lifted her chin so he could meet her ocean-blue eyes.

"I agree," he uttered.

"Would you like to come back to my house for coffee?" she asked.

"Yes, I'd like that," he confirmed, reluctantly breaking the moment which was currently ranked in the Top Five Best Moments of His Life to ask the waiter for the bill.

* * *

"Sandra?" he asked cautiously, breaking the comfortable silence that had enveloped them on the drive back to her house through the orange glow of the streetlight-filled city streets.

"Yes?" she returned slowly, with equal caution.

He knew this could create an awkward atmosphere between them, if not ruin the whole night, but he had to ask. He needed to be absolutely sure.

"Are you sure you want me to come back for coffee?" he said delicately, choosing his words carefully but making sure she understood his meaning.

She laughed heartily, instantly understanding what he really meant. "Since when has the word coffee become a synonym for sex? My intentions were perfectly innocent…" she trailed off, fluttering her eyelashes flirtatiously but still chuckling.

"I'm sure they were," he said knowingly, "But seriously though, I'm not just a wham-bam-thank-you-mam kind of bloke, I wouldn't take advantage of you like that."

Her eyes softened and she gently placed her hand on top of his, which was cradling the gear stick.

"I know you wouldn't Rob, you're a good man," she assured him before grinning mischievously, "That doesn't mean I wouldn't take advantage of you though!"

"Should I be afraid?" he laughed.

"Very."

**A/N: That expensive taste thing is me all over, I can't help it…honest ;-) Although I did have to google **_**'posh restaurant starters'**_** to find the seared scallop dish, I'd rather have a KFC any day!**


	4. Gone

_A/N: This is the first of another two or three chapters that I've decided to add to this. Thank you to all of my reviewers but particularly Simlead, who I've had a brilliant conversation with. You understand my feelings about the New Tricks fandom perfectly. :)_

_Disclaimer: I don't own New Tricks. Damn. _

Rob awoke alone in his bed, six months to the day since he had first woken up next to her. He knew before he even properly opened his eyes that the sky outside would be grey. The weather had been dismal ever since she left. Despite the fact that their first date had only been precisely 24 weeks, 2 days and 12 hours ago, their relationship had already hit the rocks. A fortnight ago, the team had received the news that Jack had passed away in a little coastal village in France. Inevitably, their world had been turned upside down. Sandra had tried to hold herself together for the sake of Gerry and Brian but outside of work she'd needed to vent her emotions.

Truthfully, he'd been expecting her to feel a multitude of emotions. She'd lived up to that expectation. He'd held her as she'd cried over the loss of her father and best friend. He'd reassured her when she thought she couldn't manage UCOS without her mentor. He'd restrained her when she was throwing the kitchen plates at the wall, taking her anger at being kept in the dark out on them instead of Brian.

Then she had gone. She'd gone away to Tuscany to 'gather her thoughts', leaving him with no explanation other than a note left on his kitchen table when he returned home from work. He recited her words in his head for the thousandth time: _"I'm going away to Tuscany for a while. I need to gather my thoughts. When I get back hopefully I can be a better girlfriend to you, if you still want me. I won't blame you if you don't. Thank you for putting up with me. S." _That was it. She hadn't even said how long she'd be gone for, Brian and Gerry had no idea either. They were as devastated as him.

It had been a week now, a week of ploughing through paperwork mindlessly, attending meetings that he couldn't care less about and generally working on auto-pilot. He'd spent a lot of time in the UCOS office, helping the bereft team with the duties that Sandra would normally take care of and taking some of the load off Steve, who had volunteered to undertake the majority of the legwork whilst the remainder of them grieved for Jack and worried for Sandra.

There was an unspoken agreement amongst them all that they shouldn't attempt to contact her. She would come back when she was ready to face reality again, he told himself. He tried to force the idea that she had done something stupid to the back of his mind, but it constantly circled to the forefront of his thoughts. Even if she had run off with a twenty year old Italian waiter, she would be safe and well. That was the most important thing. Of course, there was a part of him that was angry at her. He was annoyed that she couldn't let him protect her, why had she chosen to run away instead of talk to him?

He sighed, letting the warm water from the shower beat onto his tense back. Lately, he had been so utterly absorbed in his thoughts that he couldn't fully remember the last few minutes, like getting out of bed and getting into the shower. He was living in a haze. A woman had never got under his skin and infiltrated every part of his subconscious as much as she had. He shook his head, thinking about the part of her note that had affected him the most deeply. _"If you still want me."_ Couldn't she see how much he loved her?

As a couple, they didn't often admit their feelings for each other, at least not in public, but he had always remarked at how honest their relationship was. This disappearing act was unlike her, she would have told him. Besides, she was always so methodical and structured. It unnerved him to see how much Jack's death had affected her. Although, it wasn't often someone had the misfortune of losing two fathers in one lifetime. God, he needed to see her.

The next time he looked at the digital clock in the corner of his computer screen, it was nearing half past four. How had the day passed so quickly? The rational part of him reasoned that he was throwing himself into his work as a coping mechanism to stop himself thinking about her. The irrational part of him took himself down to the UCOS office to see if they had heard anything. Of course, they hadn't.

He slumped onto the red sofa, next to Gerry, much like he had done for the previous four days in the working week.

"Do you think she'll be gone for a set time, like a week or two weeks, or will she just come back when she wants?" the older man asked.

"If we were talking about Sandra before the news about Jack, I'd say a set time, but who knows? It's changed her, Gerry, she's not…like she was," he explained. Living with her, he thought he had a better insight into how she was feeling, but then again Brian and Gerry had known her, _properly_ known her, for almost a decade.

"I knew it had hit her badly but I just thought she was coping, you know, she's made of strong stuff,"

"We all did, mate, don't beat yourself up about it," Steve reassured his drinking partner.

"Yeah," was all Brian could manage. He had been quiet since Jack had passed away and Sandra had gone. It hurt him to know that whilst keeping the secret of one friend, he had broken the heart of another. One positive, if any could be found in this terrible situation, was that Rob had been accepted into the fold.

Thrilled was not the appropriate word when Gerry had found out that the DAC had been 'shagging' Sandra, as he so romantically put it, he was more…furious. Then had come the immature phase. Sandra had assured him that he wasn't jealous, but merely annoyed that she couldn't be his 'pub pal' as often. For a week, he had refused to talk to her outside of being civil and had insisted that she shouldn't come to the pub with them on Fridays as she should be spending quality time with her new partner like a good girlfriend should. Eventually the "ooo-ers" when they went into her office had died down, and they were all back to normal. Now, though, he suspected that they actually liked him. They'd even started making him coffee.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by the creaking of the door to the main office area as it was slowly pushed open. His eyes lifted from the spot on the floor that had been his focus for the past few minutes to the source of the noise. In the entrance stood a tanned woman wearing a white shirt and a pair of skinny jeans that hugged her long legs, teamed with sandals which were impractical for the rainy London weather. Her golden hair seemed to shine under the lights and her marine eyes only enhanced her glowing complexion. She was back.

"Hello boys,"


	5. The Return

**A/N: Okay, I'm not going to lie, this chapter is pure soppiness, but if you like that kind of thing then this is for you ;-) Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own New Tricks. If I did, I would also own all of Amanda's beautiful coat collection and I would have died and gone to heaven.**

There was a moment of collective silence amongst the four men in the room. Brian's mouth hung open comically; Steve exhaled a long gust of air; Gerry sat back in his seat, resting his palms on the back of his head and Rob rose from the red sofa slowly, like he was in the presence of royalty. None of the men quite knew what to say, but apparently Sandra had prepared a speech.

"Look, I know you've all probably been worrying about me for the past week and I understand that. I shouldn't have just left you all in the lurch with no warning. I'm sorry, but I did it for you, all of you, as much as me. I didn't want to make you feel even worse because I couldn't keep my emotions in check. I understand if you're all angry at me and you don't want to talk to me but we still have a job to do." She took a deep breath, having finished her monologue. Her posture seemed relaxed and her facial expression was one of composure, but there was something uneasy behind those blue eyes. They all remained frozen in the same tableau until Steve, ever the optimist, broke the oppressive silence.

"Welcome back, Sandra, we've missed ya," he smiled, moving across the office to pull her into a friendly hug. She patted him on the back.

"Thanks Steve," she wasn't sure was she was thanking him for, exactly, but she felt like she needed to. With that, the atmosphere seemed to relax, allowing them all to take a deep breath.

Sandra turned to her lover, who hadn't moved his eyes from her the whole time. "Can we have a word?" she asked softly, gesturing to her office. He nodded, following her into the room which she had missed whilst she was away. As she opened the door and motioned for Rob to sit down, she was greeted by a smell of not damp exactly, but disuse. She suspected that the door had remained shut since she had gone away. She closed it behind him, sealing them in her little haven.

Instead of pulling her chair around to his side of the desk and holding him in her arms like she so desperately wanted to, she sat facing him, uncertain if they were still a couple. She wasn't expecting him to hate her, he was too gentle and loving for that, but could he forgive her for what she had put him through? He remained still for what seemed like hours, looking searchingly into her pale ocean eyes. Eventually his intense stare became too much and she broke their eye contact, looking down at the polished wood of her desk.

"Do you still want me?" she asked finally, forcing herself to meet his gaze once again.

"Yes," he replied. He seemed certain but there was clearly something else he needed to say. "Sandra, I…" he stopped, releasing a noise of frustration that made her jump slightly. She had never seen him angry at her outside of work. It worried her.

"I love you," he stated honestly.

"I love you too," she whispered, "which is why I had to go away for a while. I didn't want to hurt you anymore."

"Sandra, darling, you weren't hurting me. I knew you'd have to let your emotions out when you were at home, for the sake of Gerry, Brian and Steve. I know you don't like to let them see you vulnerable or upset and I understand that. I just wanted you to open up to me, I can protect you. It's my duty," he smiled tenderly, the look of absolute love in his eyes almost making her cry. _Almost_.

"I don't like to let you see me like that either," she admitted frankly, a small ironic chuckle escaping her lips.

"You aren't superwoman, Sandra, you've got to let me take some off the weight off you sometimes. You know I'd do anything to make sure you're happy, don't you?" he brushed a stray golden hair behind her ear with a feather-light touch.

"Can you forgive me?" she asked, resting her head against his hand.

"Of course I can, just talk to me in future, okay?"

She nodded, a single tear tracing a path along her cheek. He brushed it away before it could go any further and moved around the desk to draw her into his arms, pressing her into his strong chest. She reached her hands around his neck, gripping him tightly. She'd missed this.

After four and a half minutes, according to the clock on the wall, they finally released each other.

"I suppose I'd better go explain myself to the boys," she said, stroking his jawline with her thumb.

"You don't need to explain yourself, they're just glad to have you back," he assured her. He leant forward and placed a gentle kiss on her rosy lips. She reciprocated, pulling him closer to her and capturing his lips in a deep caress.

"We'll continue this later,"

"I'll be waiting for you at home," he moved to let her pass, placing a hand on the small of her back.

She pulled open the door of her office and was instantly greeted with three pairs of curious eyes. They walked out into the main area together.

"I'll see you later," Rob walked towards the exit, an unspoken understanding passing between them that she needed some time with her team.

"Okay," she replied, mentally preparing herself for another apology speech before she was cut off by Gerry.

"Sandra, look, me and the lads have been talking and we understand why you left, we get that you did it for us as well as you," he paused as she nodded, sensing there was going to be a 'but'.

"But we're your family, Sandra, you can come to us. We're all here for you, anytime, yeah?" Brian and Steve nodded in agreement.

"I'm sorry for keeping Jack's secret from you," Brian added, still not quite able to meet her eyes.

"I'm not angry with you Brian, honestly. It's not your fault, you and Jack were just trying to protect us," she walked over to his desk and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"Are we alright?" she asked. He nodded, some rare tears forming in his eyes. "Yeah,"

"Gerry? Are we okay too?"

"Course we are, Guv," he grinned at her jokily, all the tension released from his shoulders.

"Steve?"

"As alright as relations between Scotland and England can be, yeah," he cracked, returned with laughs from his colleagues and friends.

"Well, in that case, it appears to be home time. Go on, bugger off, I'll see you all on Monday."

"Bright and early," her boys chorused simultaneously. She looked around the room contently, the hustle-and-bustle of five 'o'clock filling her ears.

"Night, Sandra," Gerry touched her shoulder on his way out, distracting her from her thoughts, swiftly followed by Brian and Steve.

"Night," She shut her office door quietly and turned off all the lights. She smiled up at the other member of her team, who was probably in the giant golf course in the stars.

"Night, Jack."


End file.
